We sat in the partially lit concert hall, third row from the front. JJ Heller stood on the stage beside her husband, Dave and she told the audience that she wanted to share a new song off her most recent album with the excited audience. I look at my husband in the dim light and watch him watch the stage, his dark eyes reflecting the lights. He glances my way, perhaps sensing my focus.
The soft music begins and JJ's voice fills the large room.
You are a house that's broken down
You are a house that's burning
and everything in me wants to run
but that's not love.
I reach over in the darkness through my tears and hold tightly to his hand.
Knowing that I am that house.
I am broken and burning, and yet...
Yet my husband holds tightly to me.
The chorus of the song continued that overflow of emotion from deep within me.
If you fall, I'll fall with you.
If you hurt I feel it too.
Even if my heart turns black and blue.
I will love you.
A slight pressure on my hand tells me that he knows how I feel in this moment, a mixture of sadness and sorrow mixed with other unnameable emotions...
The same pressure tells me that he will love me, no matter what. Sometimes you hear the lyrics of a song and are immediately aware that the song was written for you, and this is one of those songs.
In our marriage we have been through ups and downs, in our early marriage we dealt with the sorrow of two miscarriages, a job change and buying a house all in the same year. We've struggled and we've rejoiced. So, what does it look like in real life: "If you fall, I'll fall with you"?
It looks like two people sitting on the ground taking stock of their injuries, untangling limbs, trying to stop the blood, icing the bruises and bracing themselves to try to stand so they can keep limping along. It's not pretty, it's not like in books or movies, it's worse than you could imagine, but still beautiful in it's pain. God never promised we wouldn't fall, but He constantly reminds me that He's there with a first aid kit so we can get up again.
This was written as a part of 5 minute Fridays over at Gypsy Mama
Interested in linking up? Go over there for more information and to link up, but these are the rules:
1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. And then absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts about it, you
need to visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them
in their comments. Seriously. That is, like, the rule. And the fun. And
the heart of this community..
Hope to see you on the Linky!!