Jun 6, 2013

If you fall - FMF

We sat in the partially lit concert hall, third row from the front.  JJ Heller stood on the stage beside her husband, Dave and she told the audience that she wanted to share a new song off her most recent album with the excited audience.  I look at my husband in the dim light and watch him watch the stage, his dark eyes reflecting the lights.  He glances my way, perhaps sensing my focus.

The soft music begins and JJ's voice fills the large room.
You are a house that's broken down
You are a house that's burning
and everything in me wants to run
but that's not love.

I reach over in the darkness through my tears and hold tightly to his hand. 
Knowing that I am that house. 
I am broken and burning, and yet...
Yet my husband holds tightly to me.

The chorus of the song continued that overflow of emotion from deep within me.
If you fall, I'll fall with you.
If you hurt I feel it too.
Even if my heart turns black and blue.
I will love you.

A slight pressure on my hand tells me that he knows how I feel in this moment, a mixture of sadness and sorrow mixed with other unnameable emotions...
  The same pressure tells me that he will love me, no matter what.  Sometimes you hear the lyrics of a song and are immediately aware that the song was written for you, and this is one of those songs.

In our marriage we have been through ups and downs, in our early marriage we dealt with the sorrow of two miscarriages, a job change and buying a house all in the same year.  We've struggled and we've rejoiced.  So, what does it look like in real life: "If you fall, I'll fall with you"?

It looks like two people sitting on the ground taking stock of their injuries, untangling limbs, trying to stop the blood, icing the bruises and bracing themselves to try to stand so they can keep limping along.  It's not pretty, it's not like in books or movies, it's worse than you could imagine, but still beautiful in it's pain.  God never promised we wouldn't fall, but He constantly reminds me that He's there with a first aid kit so we can get up again.



This was written as a part of 5 minute Fridays over at Gypsy Mama Interested in linking up? Go over there for more information and to link up, but these are the rules: 1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. And then absolutely, no ifs, ands or buts about it, you need to visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them in their comments. Seriously. That is, like, the rule. And the fun. And the heart of this community..
Hope to see you on the Linky!!

19 comments:

  1. Beautiful! I've got tears in my eyes. What a wonderful kind of love God has blessed you and your husband with! Cherish it.

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    1. Thank you, I am learning to do just that!!

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  2. Oh man, what a beautiful read! Thank you for sharing!

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    1. Thank you for your post too, your scripture is one I am printing for my desk. :)

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  3. An early morning cry is good for my soul. I think marriage is the most beautiful in the hard times.

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    1. It is, and still it's impossibly hard to always appreciate the journey, when there are sharks in the water, and my boat has holes in it. ;)

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  4. My heart is beating with and for you today. What beautiful truth and raw honesty here. The hardships in marriage, but awesome to sum it up -- if you fall, I'll fall with you!! Have a blessed weekend friend.

    positivelyalene.com

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    1. Thank you Alene! I just love the song, it's such a true statement about what marriage should be.

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  5. JJ Heller ... LOVE her! Thank you for sharing this today, AJ ...

    Linda

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  6. I love this song! So touching....I too encountered two miscarriages. It is hard....Isn't life just a beautiful mess?

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    1. It is a beautiful mess. And I know that I add to the mess with my actions sometimes. :) But at least God still loves me (and my hubby does too).

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  7. Those ups and especially the downs...yes, still so beautiful even in their pain. I love this...thank you so much for sharing today! Blessings and happy weekend! :)

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    1. Glad you stopped by! Thanks for the sweet comment!

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  8. Found you back! And so glad I did. What a beautiful post. I love the real truth of real life and real love here. It's not always pretty, but grace carries us, doesn't it? So greatful for that. Loving this song too - what a gift. I'm going to have to go hunt up this CD! This > beautiful in the pain. I love that. Bless you.

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    1. Glad you found me back! :) Thanks for the thoughtful comment. It's a great CD all around. One of my favorites of hers.

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  9. WOW! Thanks for taking me to this special place! What a wonderful conversation through hand squeezes... you totally took me there and I'm all choked up!

    Perfect song for this word too!

    I just followed you (google friend connect, fb, twitter, and pinterest). Looking forward to connecting with you more.

    Visiting from FMF.

    Love, Traci Michele @ Ordinary Inspirations
    http://www.ordinaryinspirations.blogspot.com

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  10. This made me smile. JJ Heller is awesome, and you guys are a cute couple!

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  11. What a beautiful story and what a beautiful song! I needed to hear both.

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